Andrew Snowdon

Still Life

In Uncategorized on Thursday 17 December 2009 at 15:32

To illustrate the reality of my seemingly glamorous lifestyle, I present to you the current contents of my coffee table:

  • a copy of The Collins Gage Canadian Paperback Dictionary
  • Christopher Moore’s novel Bloodsucking Fiends (lent to me by a friend)
  • The first season of Doctor Who (the new series) on DVD (lent to me by the same friend)
  • Helvetica, also on DVD (given to me for my birthday by another friend)
  • two crocheted doilies that belonged to my grandmother
  • a glass, a shotglass, bottles of Southern Comfort, Jack Daniel’s and Diet Coke, a pack of Marlboros, a pack of Viceroy Filter King Size, and a coffee cup with a painting of an apple on it, all empty
  • a brandy glass holding an eyedropper half-full of sweet almond massage oil
  • a tin of Skoal chewing tobacco, wintergreen (I do not chew tobacco)
  • my Jack Daniel’s Zippo lighter
  • a Disneyland ashtray containing six cigarette butts and a mountain of ash
  • a nail file
  • my iPhone
  • my tobacco pipe
  • a mostly empty pack of du Maurier Premières
  • Besides the rather obvious fact that I need to clean off my coffee table, what does that say about me?

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    1. It says that a lot of other people leave their shit at your home.

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