I’m on Twitter: why aren’t YOU?

I’ve tried to get this point across in a number of different ways to my dearest friends. Just plain invitation didn’t work. Explaining, coaxing, cajoling, pleading, bargaining, grovelling and pretty much everything short of bribery has turned up null. So I’m changing tacks.

The short of the matter is: if you are on Twitter, you are awesome. If you’re not, you have some explaining to do. I want answers.

I should exempt some folks from having to defend their failure to use this vital evolutionary tool: The illiterate, those with no mobile devices whatsoever, the entirely antisocial, people who are neither interesting nor interested. And that about covers it.

As for the rest of you, I want you to defend yourselves. What gives? How long did it take you to take up e-mail or get a touchtone phone? Are you still attached to your telegraph key? Your smoke-signal rug?

I suspect that some of you think that Twitter requires some kind of commitment, like Facebook, which it doesn’t. But I’m not sure. In fact, I am quite devoid of any idea why someone would not use Twitter, and would like someone to let me in on the secret.
I’m waiting…