What am I saying?

In the course of my latest Important Internet Research Project, I came across an interesting technique used by law enforcement professionals called Statement Analysis.

What Statement Analysis boils down to, is looking at the words and phrasing a person uses to say something, for example if they are writing a witness statement or confessing to a crime. Before you assume this has nothing to do with you, I invite you to consider that this technique is not limited to the police interview room. In fact, any writing or conversation could be analyzed using these methods. You may wish to check out statementanalysis.com, where some of the techniques are explained, with real-life, recognizable examples. If you are a poker player, you’re well aware of the importance of a person’s “tell,” and how it can pretty much give their hand away. Imagine you could have that kind of information about a person over the phone, or through the printed word alone.

Today, I had an absolute ball listening carefully to what people were saying around me, and how they were saying it. There were a couple of things I learned, as a result of applying what I remembered of the technique, that I otherwise would have overlooked. My day was punctuated by moments of frank laughter as I detected when people were lying or insecure, truthful or preoccupied.

Like all tools, however, this technique is a double-edged sword, and most dangerous when pointed at oneself. I found myself saying things in a way that indicated things I did not necessarily want to reveal. There were points when I seriously considered the possibility that I may be a compulsive liar. Worst of all, I was interviewed for a job position today and found myself more conscious of how I was saying things than what the optimum answer was. Of course, I picked up more than a few things about the interviewers… we’ll see how that pans out.

I’m ever so reluctant to take a technique like this at face value — I mean, it’s not that far off from graphology, for God’s sake. Thus far, my limited application of it has proven spookily accurate. Will I keep it in mind when conversing with others? Naturally. Will I read everything with a heightened sense of the language used? Undoubtedly. Will I change the way I say things as a result? Very probably.

I encourage anyone who’s still undecided on the subjects of O.J. Simpson, Michael Jackson and William Jefferson Clinton to go pick up the basics of this interesting technique — you may make up your mind very quickly, in spades.

But don’t say I didn’t warn you.